Katie and Jason’s Road to Parenthood

Jason and I met a bit later in life than some couples hoping to have a family do. I was 34 and he was 39 on our first date (which by the way was over pizza and wine and was super fun). I had thought about freezing my eggs before meeting Jason but never actually did it. After meeting him I thought I had plenty of time to figure that out and decided not to harp too much on the “biological clock” hoopla people so often talk about. A few months into dating we had the talk about wanting kids one day and we were on the same page. It wasn’t until just before we got engaged though that I brought up making embryos just to give us a safety net – and what a guy – Jason was all about it. I was fortunate in that my insurance at the time covered the cost of a full cycle – sans all of the medication (which holy cow – it’s crazy expensive). Looking back, I could have never guessed what a process it was all going to be… 

I stopped taking my birth control at the end of 2020 in hopes of regulating my cycle after being on the pill for about 6 years.  I remember in early 2021 going in to check my “baseline” and the doctor telling me right there — at the age of 35 — I shouldn’t wait to freeze eggs… my AMH was not super ideal (a 0.3). I was so bummed and a tad freaked out. There is a lot of testing that goes on when you decide to freeze your eggs and make embryos. After the baseline bloodwork and ultrasound, Jason and I did genetic testing only to find out both he and I are both carriers of Nephrotic Syndrome (a kidney disease). Our fertility doctor was worried, telling us it was likely we would have a 25% chance of passing this on to our baby… likely meaning she wouldn’t live past a certain age. I cried. She insisted we meet with a genetic counselor. After they looked into it further, it turned out Jason and I carried different versions or variants so the chance we would pass it to our baby was more like 1/250,000. Phew. 

The next hurdle was doing an HSG – which was the most painful experience of my life by the way. This is done so the doctor can look at your tubes… if you want to know more about what an HSG is, please Google it. It involved a balloon and your hoo-hah and it’s scary. I ended up having a seizure on the table during mine due to the excruciating pain and that’s because they found out one of my tubes is likely blocked (they still aren’t 100% positive because I had a seizure and they couldn't get an accurate look but the doctor assumed since the ink wasn’t passing through on my left side – that’s why). I had an ectopic pregnancy over a decade ago and while at the time the doctor was able to save my tube after undergoing an emergency surgery - 10 years later, my new doctor says there is scar tissue creating that blockage.

Anyways. After all that… I  was ready to begin taking my hormone injections aka “stims”  to prepare for an egg retrieval. I’ll save all the retrieval details for a later post but just know it involved a lot of shots and a lot of appointments. Towards the end I was swollen… bloated and very emo. The doctor only retrieved 6 eggs. Once Jason did his part and we waited to see how many fertilized (5)… and we eventually ended up with 3 embryos and decided to PGT-A test them (I’ll also share more on that later). Our results came in about 10 days and all 3 embryos were females but only one was “normal.” We decided to freeze her, plan our wedding and enjoy each other for the next few months… 

In the meantime I had also started taking supplements and vitamins to potentially raise my AMH and give us a shot at conceiving naturally. All the vitamin D and coQ10 worked because it went from 0.3 to 1.4 and eventually a very ideal 2.1 (while exciting, I have since learned that vitamin D can interfere with assays that measure AMH which is why I find it helpful to measure both levels). This was just another example of how we realized we could help people through our story. My AMH was also tested so many times… it would have been more convenient to do it at home and to understand how vitamin D supplements were affecting it. 

Anyways.

Fast forward to November. We got married… and a few weeks later I had a weird gut feeling that I was pregnant. I don’t even know why. I took a test and boom – two lines. How could this be?! It was a miracle! I felt ecstatic and lucky. We literally conceived the weekend of our wedding. We started telling our families earlier than you’re “supposed to” because we were so excited and made our first OBGYN appt.

At our first appointment (I was a little over 6 weeks) the doctor confirmed she saw a fetal pole – possibly TWO (gah, twins!) but there was no heartbeat(s). She said sometimes it takes longer… and to come back in a few weeks. We went back just after Christmas and sadly, still no heartbeat(s). We sobbed.

I was told this was a “missed miscarriage.” That while the pregnancy wasn’t viable my body didn’t recognize that and still thought I was pregnant. I was given pills that day… and miscarried over the next few days. I will also share more on that traumatizing and devastating experience in a later post. 

We took the next few months to heal and then decided we should implant our one healthy embryo but wanted to do another egg retrieval first since we only had the one viable chance. We went to a new doctor this time – using Jason’s insurance - but the doctor said to wait a cycle as he just didn’t see enough eggs to make it worth it. Again. Bad news.

We needed to relax… spend some time together… have a little fun… so we took a late honeymoon to Italy… Weeks after we got back we met with the doctor and we were ready to start stims for the next cycle. Just before – work  decided to send me back to Europe though – so I was off to London for about 72 hours. I had taken a pregnancy test before leaving just in case… It was negative. When I returned I took another test and WOW. Faint line… I was shocked and took about 10 more tests over the next few days to ensure the lines were getting darker. They were… and then they weren’t. We went to a nearby clinic to see what was going on…  and after a few trips to Quest Labs for HCG blood tests – they confirmed the pregnancy but it was not viable. I was devastated… another loss.  

We went back to the fertility doctor that week once my period came back after the loss and we were ready to begin stims again. It had been a busy work week but we did our first round of shots and then the next day I began feeling sick. I was exhausted, my throat hurt… I had just gotten home from interviewing a celebrity and thought I should COVID test. That test was positive…. I was infuriated.

We let our doctors know what was going on and had to stop stims and wait… again… for another cycle.  During that time (and after I finally tested negative for Covid) I threw my younger sister her dream baby shower. I was crying inside but did everything in my power to make her day as special and magical as could be. 

A few weeks later we re-ordered and re-started our stims and were on our way to another egg retrieval. This time we got just 7 eggs and again decided to PGT-A test once our embryo report was in. Again, only 3 embryos… and again, just one “normal” (a boy!) and one low-mosaic girl. The 3rd embryo was labeled complex abnormal.  

We took it as a victory. 

We went back to our first doctor and told her we were ready to implant our first embryo… I will detail this part of the journey in a later post (the transfer process is, similar to a retrieval, quite long) but after a whole lot of shots and pills… I am happy to share that our first transfer in September of 2022 was successful.

A fun fact: During the first few months of my pregnancy the idea for Novalynn Fertility was born and in December we got to work on it! And as I write this first blog post for Novalynn, Inc. I am weeks away from delivering our baby girl.

In conversations with friends and even Internet acquaintances over the last few years, I’ve always felt that our story and experiences could help others. The more we talk, the more we all realize we’re not alone. The bonus now is hopefully also continuing to share, learn and educate while mitigating the amount of lab tests and costs for others hoping to start a family. 

I do hope this post was helpful… or at least maybe helped someone feel less alone in their journey. 

As someone who has had to take every blood test under the sun over the past few years, our biggest wish is that Novalynn Fertility can make your process a bit easier and more comfortable. Thanks for listening… more from our journey to come.